If Columbus was right I’d drive straight off the edge

Once Fiona Apple wrote that sony didn’t like every much, here it is in full.

-Haunted Trails was a let down, or maybe the weather caused the let down. I will try it again once it is warmer, or i get fatter. All of the children playing video games were mobidly FATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!

-I am going to see Matt Skiba/7 Seconds Tonight. Pretty Much Stoked. I feel as though i will be missing Brian Connor tonight.

Last week when Emma was here her, Thirza and I went to CURSED, which simply is a cinematic gift from baby jesus. Two CrAzY werefolk roaming the streets of L.A. three nights a month praying on attractive young ladies aka Mya(the boy is mine), Shannon Elizabeth, Christina Ricci and her Dorky brother. These aren’t just any werefolk, during the day one is a high strung P.R. bitch, and the other is a handsome club promoter.

It was instense as fuck Pacey and Fern Mayo are werewolves. Fern Mayo seeks out revenge on Pacey for turning her into a werewolf, so she goes and fucks shit up with all of the girls he slept with after her. In this movie Pacey is a total heartbreaker due to his heighted sexual energy that is given off from being a werewolf. Since Pacey is a heartbreak, he bummmmmmms out lots of ladies.

While trying to save Shannon Elizabeth from a car accident(bitch totally flew her car off of Mulholland Drive and lived, i think she is made from super human parts) Christina Ricci and her brother get attacked by Fern Mayo when she is eating the flesh and blood from Shannon Elizabeth. Luckily for them shit goes Bananas and they kill Fern Mayo thinking they are safe from a the wolfy-life, they are wrong!!!!! Little Do they know they have to kill the dude who started this mess, THIS MEANS PACEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its hard hard battle, of silver and seperating brains from hearts, but shit gets done. Then brother bear and sister bear totally live a wolf free life and no longer bare the mark of the beast.

I give this movie at least a 10 out of 10. It really showcases Chrstina Ricci’s acting skillzzzz(if you thought she was good in Casper or Now and Then you aint seen shit), it has a dog werewolf(this is always good), it gave Joshua Jackson one last time to shine post dawson’s creek, and it gave the girl who played Fern Mayo in Jawbreak a chance to remind the world that she looks like this girl i went to high school with.


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