10 Worst Things About Summer by Suzanna Wolff

10. Back-of-the-knee sweat.

9. Realizing you might be too old for pool toys.

8. Realizing you might be too fat for pool toys.

7. Trying to find fun things to do without resorting to planning because the best stuff always happens naturally. Really. Stuff’s going to happen. You’re not worried.

6. Re-runs. Re-runs.

5. When people walk up too close behind you and step on the back of your flip-flop. Listen bitch, you’re too f*cking close.

4. Feeling like a crapbag if you don’t go outside but, let’s be honest, not really wanting to go outside.

3. The fact that it’s already August and you haven’t done any of the awesome stuff you thought you’d do and knowing–no matter what you tell that quasi-friend from college who keeps leaving “Hey, how’s your summer going?!?” Facebook wall messages–that you’re probably not going to do anything awesome, or even vaguely interesting, in August either because it’s just really hot outside.

2. When people say, “It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity.”

1. The humidity.


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